


Quiz: Who Is Your Peaky Match?

by Ashling



Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M, It's like a Buzzfeed quiz but 10 times more accurate, M/M, Multi, Other, YOU GET THREE CHARACTER MATCHES, admittedly also 10 times more complicated, just try it, there are 54 imagines here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 03:47:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 19,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16339241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashling/pseuds/Ashling
Summary: A 20-question quiz that'll tell you three Peaky characters you're compatible with, and a drabble about the way you met them.warning: quiz contains increasing quantities of memes as it goes on, imagines are extremely Softgender neutral reader, gay friendly af18 possible results x 3 characters per result = 54 small imagines





	1. Chapter 1

This is a 20-question quiz. As of November 2018, I've programmed a nice place for you to take it [here](http://philome.la/ThisTwine/quiz-who-is-your-peaky-match/play). 

If you don't want to take it there, feel free to write down your answers to the 20 questions below, and then leave a comment with them. (For example: bbacebbdaebaccecdeaa) I'll reply with a comment telling you the match number you got.

Or you can just skip the quiz and get to the imagines.

 

**1\. What WWI-era job did you have?  
**

a) nurse

b) soldier

c) translator

d) diplomat

e) spy

 

**2\. Big spoon or little spoon?**

a) big spoon most of the time

b) little spoon most of the time

c) either one is good

d) I’d rather not sleep with anyone

e) that’s a false binary, hoe

 

**3\. If you could, what would you splurge on?**

a) a new bike

b) a massive bookshelf

c) a music streaming subscription

d) a canoe

e) a walk-in closet

 

**4\. Let’s say your ship goes down and you’re rationing food for the people left on your small lifeboat. You have one extra piece of food. Who do you give it to?**

a) my cousin

b) the youngest person there

c) the oldest person there

d) I assign it randomly, leaving it to luck

e) give??? that’s MY food

 

**5\. What action movie character are you?**

a) the hero, blam blam

b) he hero’s ex, who has moved on and made a fabulous life for themselves

c) the wise old sage that everyone goes to for life advice, love, and the occasional asskicking

d) the cutie/sidekick that sacrifices themselves to save the world

e) the tech cutie with the laptop that gets to drink as much coffee as they want

 

**6\. Who’s your favorite Greek god?**

a) Athena, goddess of wisdom & strategy, grey eyes aesthetic, and getting all As

b) Aphrodite, goddess of hoes, lovers, and hoe lovers, judging nobody, and looking good as fuck with seashell-braided hair

c) Hades, god of keeping a VERY LONG grudge, death/the underworld, and ‘I wish that people wouldn’t die because I hate spending time with them’

d) Artemis, goddess the forest, ace lesbian separatism, and tearing creeps apart w/ her good doggos

e) Dionysus, god of a l c o h o l, parties where literally everyone’s invited, and fuckwit tomfoolery

 

**7\. There’s a bar fight. What’s going on?**

a) I don’t know and I don’t care.

b) me, bitch! I don’t even know how but I’m out here and I’m having a great time

c) I started the fight but I’m standing over in a corner watching for the fun of it

d) protecting my little brother went a lil too far

e) I’ve studied everyone here and I can make significant money off betting who’ll win

 

**8\. What is your supervillain origin story?**

a) A lot of bad shit happened to me and nobody seemed to care, so I figured I’d get revenge.

b) Like Robespierre, I wanted equal rights for everybody, and like Robespierre, I got a lil too enthusiastic with the guillotine.

c) I thought I could do a better job of running things than those in power…and I was right.

d) My best friend got into supervillainy recently, and damned if I’m gonna let them go it alone.

e) I was born for this fucking role. Being evil is FUN.

 

**9\. Tell me about your pet.**

a) My horse is short and sturdy and it can carry me all across the country.

b) My cat is super old and kind of blind, so I guide it around outside on a leash, but it’s cuddly af.

c) My dog is big enough to guard me when I walk around at night.

d) My fish breed fast and are really tasty. (What? I’M A HUNGRY HOE)

e) My puppy is a so smart, I’m currently training it to fetch the newspaper.

 

**10\. Choose a journey to take.**

a) Caribbean island trip w/ bae

b) service/learning trip to rural Vietnam w/ a bunch of friends

c) whole family in a bunch of mountain cabins, Alberta, Canada

d) London, UK by myself

e) Cape Town, South Africa for the culture with the cool cousins

 

**11\. In a fantasy AU, what magic talisman helped you gain power?**

a) the amulet of persuasion

b) the sword of savagery

c) the elixir of love

d) the tome of wizardry

e) the majesty of a swift kick to the ass

 

**12\. Pick a classic imagine.**

a) hurt/comfort, and y/n is doing the comforting

b) hurt/comfort, and y/n is the one that got hurt

c) y/n and y/n’s significant other go off to war together

d) y/n’s significant other returns from war

e) y/n makes their significant other “feel good” *smirk emoji*

 

**13\. What’s a vice of yours?**

a) selfishness

b) anger

c) laziness

d) self-righteousness

e) greed

 

**14\. What’s a virtue of yours?**

a) selflessness

b) patience

c) empathy

d) bravery

e) honor

 

**15\. Which Fuck You Tommy moment do you feel most deeply in your soul?**

a) Tommy: “The gin?” May: “Too sweet.”

b) Ada: “Do you know how unfair it is that you’ve got four Bugattis when half the country’s starving?”

c) Tommy: “May I smoke?” Linda: “No.”

d) Polly: “Do you know, it was a fine speech you made in there, about this company believing in equal rights for women. But when it comes to it, you don’t listen to a word we say.”

e) Tommy: “If you ever talk about getting lost again, I will cut you from this family.” Esme: “What family?”

 

**16\. What’s your free time OTP?**

a) knitting & gossiping (read: talking shit)

b) rugby & casual homosexualité

c) cooking & harvesting compliments from guests

d) writing & astral projecting

e) riding horses & becoming one with the earth

 

**17\. Pick a knife.**

a) swiss army knife

b) penknife

c) butter knife

d) stiletto knife

e) hunting knife

 

**18\. What’s one key moment from your relationship with your partner?**

a) I was inspired by them to find a cure for a deadly disease, saving thousands, and it was hella romantic

b) I shared my deepest darkest secrets with them through my art and it was hella romantic

c) I proposed to them by using every member of my family holding up cue cards at appropriate moments and it was hella romantic

d) I killed a [insert Immigrant Ethnicity™ here for Maximum Peaky Accuracy] for them and it was hella romantic

e) we rickrolled their grandma and skeedaddled with all the Inheritance Cash and it was hella romantic?

 

**19\. Pick a song from 2018.**

a) NFWMB by Hozier

b) breathin by Ariana Grande

c) Apeshit by Beyoncé and Jay Z

d) Geyser by Mitski

e) 0 to 100 / The Catch up by Drake (*it’s from 2015 but I’m tired)

 

**20\. What’s the mood, babe?**

a) country boyyy, I love you

b) THIS BITCH EMPTY, YEET

c) today’s forecast, we can clearly see, is somebody got me fucked UP. fucked UP.

d) pronos and froo-aights and coricles. penapeeples. papaYEAH? banaynays. cantalapoops. shampaganay manjuice. WHAT the…??

e) hi I’m Jared I’m 19 and I never learned how to fukcin read

 

Great job! Comment with your answers (for example, bbacebbdaebaccecdeaa) and I will run the program that evaluates your answers and let you know your match number.

For more Peaky content that isn't pure fanfiction, look me up [on tumblr](http://hethrewmyheartinthecut.tumblr.com).


	2. #136: Freddie Thorne, Jessie Eden, Isaiah Jesus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of these are copypasted from my tumblr, hopefully the gifs and formatting is all right

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint – after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive – but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

Examples: Jessie Eden, Jeremiah Jesus

* * *

 

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Freddie Thorne

(s1 AU: he and Ada were close friends, but not in love)

[Originally posted by awhoreslies](https://tmblr.co/ZWLbkw1EeNu2P)

On your first date with Freddie Thorne, you both got arrested for conspiracy to commit treason. So yeah, you figured out how things were gonna be pretty quick. To this day, he’s amazed and inspired by your fearlessness and determination, and when he goes to make speeches, you go with him. You’re tacitly recognized as his bodyguard in the streets, although in the sheets it’s a different matter altogether. When you two can get a little time alone together, you like to explore the city of Birmingham and share with each other your favorite spots to watch the sun set.

Unexpected Bonus: Freddie loves to read. Some nights, when you lie in bed, he’ll read almost anything to you – poetry, newspaper articles, short stories – until you either jump him or fall asleep, depending on what kind of a day it’s been.

* * *

## Jessie Eden

(post-s4 AU: She Never Fucked Tommy, That Was A Bad Idea)

[Originally posted by oberelias](https://tmblr.co/Z8lEQy2SXs_Zt)

When you volunteered at the library, Jessie, Ada, Freddie, and other Communists often hung around in the stacks, plotting. You’d bring them tea every now and then. She resisted asking you out because she’d heard you had some kind of police background, but eventually you ended up saving her from a police raid and gaining her trust. You leave that part of your past well alone now, although you do find yourself sorting through intel with her over late-night dinners. You live together. Jessie loves the sound of your laugh and the way you comb your fingers through her hair.

Unexpected Bonus: Jessie is a huge favorite at The Chain, a pub that is frequented and controlled by the women who work in Birmingham’s many manufacturing plants, several of whom are gigantic lesbians. They are tough as nails, but they warm to you once they see that you’re good for Jessie. They know you and Jessie have a bit of a tight budget, so a lot of nights, a woman in massive work boots will buy you a free drink and slap you on the back and you will feel more validated than you’ve ever felt in your whole damn life.

* * *

## Isaiah Jesus 

(post-s4 AU: Isaiah and Finn take over some of Michael’s functions in the business when Michael goes to America)

[Originally posted by bonniebirdsgifcentre](https://tmblr.co/ZxJCmg2LCrz_Q)

Isaiah always expected that if he could only get enough power and money with the Peaky Blinders, then he would eventually be respected, despite being a black man in Birmingham. However, he found this was not the case. Frustrated, he eventually started showing up to meetings of a political organization for racial equality, trying to see how he could help. That’s where you met him. Today, he loves to debate with you and often takes you to The Garrison to show you off to all his friends. He swears up and down you’re the most attractive person he’s ever met.

Unexpected Bonus: Isaiah still enjoys boxing, and will often get the two of you amazing front-row seats to the most exciting matches. Occasionally, he’ll invite you to go to the gym after hours with him, too. There’s sparring and then there’s Sparring™, if you know what I mean…

Unexpected Bonus #2: Isaiah can be pretty domestic, and he takes great pride in knowing how to help you with your hair, whether that’s braiding it or trimming it. He has a deft hand and a great fashion sense, so that shouldn’t be a surprise. It can be really relaxing.


	3. #137: Ruben Oliver, Lizzie Stark, Tommy Shelby

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint – after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive – but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Ruben Oliver

(post-s3 AU; Polly broke up with him to protect him from the business)

[Originally posted by parmachkais](https://tmblr.co/ZZSlYh2aVFIaF)

The Robin Hood of the art world, you first met Ruben when you were conducting a heist at a high-end auction of artifacts from Southern Rhodesia (modern Zimbabwe). He nearly foiled your heist, but you explained to him that you were returning the artifacts to their rightful owners, and he let you go. You started seeing him to make sure he wouldn’t narc, but eventually he won you over for real with his suave flirting. Today, you’re happy knowing that after every heist, you can return to a lovely studio full of beauty and flowers, and the man you love.

Unexpected Bonus: Ruben knows all the gossip about high society…and I mean ALL the gossip, from his time in it when he was married to his wife. So every time you attend an auction with him, scoping out the art, you have an absolutely banger of a time with him, murmuring about who’s had an affair with who, and who lied about what, and which cousin got cut from the family, etc. etc. etc. Occasionally, a particularly evil cad will make eyes at you, whereupon he’ll discreetly put a hand on the small of your back, not jealous, just adorably protective.

* * *

## Lizzie Stark

(s1 AU: Lizzie never agreed to sleep with Tommy after getting engaged to John, but John married Esme anyways)

[Originally posted by awhoreslies](https://tmblr.co/ZWLbkw1e1YP8N)

After being left by John, Lizzie was heartbroken, but a friend eventually convinced her to go on a blind date with you. You courted her for a long time, bringing her fresh flowers, flirting with her mercilessly, and eventually kissing her for the first time under starlight. Today, she appreciates the way that you don’t judge her or make a fuss about her sex work. She’s just as smart as you are, and you consider her one of your most valuable advisors regarding your business, where you are a top executive with a lot of difficult ethical decisions to make.

Unexpected Bonus: Lizzie’s sister has two young kids and a baby, and has gotten pregnant AGAIN, so while she’s on bed rest, you and Lizzie end up babysitting quite a lot. The two kids can be a handful, but they’re also charming, but the round-cheeked baby is so, so adorable. You’ve never seen anything as lovely in your life as Lizzie singing lullabies to the baby. Lizzie’s sister adores you, and when you feel ready to get engaged to her, she helps you arrange the entire thing and welcomes you into their family.

* * *

## Tommy Shelby

(during s4: as Tommy runs for Parliament)

[Originally posted by secretlyafanficwriterwhore](https://tmblr.co/ZO2TjZ2ZdmxVW)

You spent a long time working your way to your position as head of the Grace Shelby Institute, where you make sure that all the children get the education, food, clothing, shelter, and most importantly, love. Your work is important to you, so when you found yourself falling for Tommy, you shunned him at first. But after a late night in the office, planning a fundraiser, and maybe a little whiskey…things got out of hand. Now, you and Tommy a rising power couple; you use your amazing memory and strategic brain to help him navigate political society.

Unexpected Bonus: When you say it’s honestly kind of creepy that there’s staff all around his massive fucking mansion, Tommy tells Mary to get them to all fuck off for the weekend. Then you explore the place, room by room. (You also Explore™ in some of the rooms…) When it comes to dinner, you sit on a countertop and continually doubt his culinary abilities as he laughs and gets increasingly mock-angry with you. You shut up his insults with a kiss, and then you both get so distracted that the food actually does burn.


	4. #138: Lizzie Stark, Ada Thorne, Arthur Shelby

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint – after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive – but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## Lizzie Stark

(after s2)

[Originally posted by awhoreslies](https://tmblr.co/ZWLbkw1e_7V0Q)

After the events of the Derby, Lizzie was so upset that she decided she needed a life change. She left the Shelby business, became a secretary at a local law firm, and joined an all-women boardinghouse, where you are the main cook. Sometimes, when she couldn’t sleep early in the morning, she got up and helped you prepare breakfast, and you were both so tired and vulnerable that you had long, honest conversations about your lives. Today, she runs the boardinghouse with you and you both have a much better time sleeping side by side.

Unexpected Bonus: With time and resources, Lizzie’s fashion sense is impeccable. The two of you set up a free clothing swap for some of the women that live in your boardinghouse, and you have to wash all the clothes twice because of the sorting process. First, you wash the clothes. Then you have a great time trying on all the clothes in a private “fashion show”. Then you have to wash them all again and sort them out for the girls. Occasionally you find something that really suits her, and then she keeps it.

* * *

## Ada Thorne

(s2 AU: Ada takes up Freddie’s work as an organizer after his death)

[Originally posted by museelo](https://tmblr.co/Z01qMx29WQdnK)

As Inspector Campbell returned and made life hell for Ada’s family, Ada worked herself to the bone to continue her husband’s mission. You didn’t know her well, but as a fellow Communist that often attended meetings with her, you could tell she was struggling, and eventually you started going over to her place to take care of her and Karl. She grew to know you well, and eventually you fell in love. Today, you officially live together and Karl adores you. Self-care is the law of the land, and your favorite indulgence is a shared bath in a huge bathtub.

Unexpected Bonus: Tommy sends gangsters to come guard the house, and you, ever hospitable, invite them in and give them toast and tea. After a while, you get to talking, and then you become friends, and then eventually they start showing up to your workers’ rights meetings. Ada is flabbergasted, and you are very smug. Convert a gangster into a communist? You Are That Bitch. Tommy would come to the house and argue with you about it, but he’s afraid to because of how thoroughly you and Ada have roasted him every previous time he’s shown his face. She’s bad enough on her own, but you and Ada together? DEVASTATING.

* * *

## Arthur Shelby

(after s1)

[Originally posted by alreadybrokenheart](https://tmblr.co/ZzVRLo2ZKld3s)

You had been dating Arthur for a while when you found he’d overdosed. As a nurse, you were able to help him. When Arthur finally came to, he started crying and confessed to you everything that he’d done and all his regrets. When you heard about how Tommy was making him pour out his meds and encouraging his addictions, you marched down to Watery Lane and…persuaded Polly to be on your side. Checkmate. Then you had Arthur get a legal job. Today, he’s clean, and he tells you every day how much he loves you and your big heart.

Unexpected Bonus: Arthur turns out to be not only a gifted drawer, but a decent full-on painter as well. If business gets too hectic and he doesn’t get much of a chance to see you, he’ll leave little doodles with notes for you on the kitchen counter. One day, he gives you a small handmade book that he’s painted. The book tells, through pictures and words, the story of how you two fell and love. The last page simply says: “Marry me?”


	5. #146: Alfie Solomons, Aberama Gold, Polly Gray

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Alfie Solomons

(s4 AU)

[Originally posted by tommyshhelby](https://tmblr.co/Ztk8sa2VYkBe4)

He’s dying, but you’re too busy to stop falling in love with him. When he’s losing power and some of his men begin to jump ship, you take up the fight for him. Maybe he sees in you his own ferocity and care for the tight-knit Jewish community you both grew up in. Maybe he’s in love with you too. It’s hard to tell. But you’re not lying when you tell him that if you could trade the whole business, your inheritance, for one more year with him, you’d do it in a heartbeat. He just smiles that fucking smile.

Unexpected Bonus: You visit his beach house as often as you can, as often as business will allow, but it can be dreadfully grueling work, coaxing Alfie to get up and fucking move around a bit instead of perpetually dozing on the windowseat. That is, until your neighbor shows up, complaining that Cyril’s impregnated her dog. With the addition of eight puppies, things are suddenly much easier. Alfie will do pretty much anything if you’ll just hold one in front of his face. The man doesn’t just like the little furballs, he practically melts around them. And it makes you happy to make him happy, even if it’s just for a little while longer.

* * *

## Aberama Gold

(after s4)

[Originally posted by aidangillens](https://tmblr.co/Zyz4im2Sr_veJ)

The Golds are as much a battalion as they are a brotherhood, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. You knew what you were getting into when you married Aberama. As cunning as a fox, as vicious as a wolf, as deadly as snake: this could describe him, but it’s actually word-for-word part of his proposal to you, compliments you accept proudly along with the ring. The lot of you sell your trigger fingers on the daily, but your hearts belong to each other, and that’s enough. The freedom of the road is more important to you than anything.

Unexpected Bonus: Aberama has always loved navigating water, whether that’s something as narrow as a canal or as wide a sea. When Bonnie and Esmeralda have reached their third hour of fighting and Sam’s just announced that Billie might be pregnant and it’s all way, way too much, Aberama will just say something along the lines of “you’re all old enough to not die for a night” and then flee the scene so the two of you can paddle down some river and do a little fishing. It’s good to get a minute of peace away from the riotous family, even if you do love them. It’s good to have a quiet moment with him at sunset.

* * *

## Polly Gray

(WWI AU)

[Originally posted by fockingshelby](https://tmblr.co/Zp4Csa2YGR9ex)

You’ve been helplessly in love with Polly Gray since the day you met her, July 9, 1987. When you offered yourself to be her lieutenant, trying to get closer, she said you weren’t family and anyways she doubted you could get the job done. You asked her what job she needed done the most in the world, then left. Two days later, you returned, knuckles busted and with a boy in tow. Whenever anyone doubts your fitness for the role, you let Polly tell them: you killed a priest with your bare hands for it. That usually shuts them up.

Unexpected Bonus: Michael is a massive asshole even at the age of twelve, but just for you, he’ll occasionally drop the entire act to give you some kind of hint at how to woo his mother. The hints are pretty fucking subtle, for a kid that age, and if you ever ask him about it directly, the implication that he likes you, or his mum, or anybody really, is enough to make him recoil like he’s been accused of a crime. But if you just murmur a general acknowledgement and then go do as you’re told, things usually turn out very well: Polly likes the flowers you’ve chosen, appreciates the coffee, leans into you after a long, hard day, the anniversary of her children getting taken. The coup d’etat is when you find her grandmother’s necklace that she had to pawn for hospital bills a while back, and bring it to her. That’s your first kiss, your hands tentative on her waist, hers sure and tender in your hair. This courtship’s gonna take a while, but you’re satisfied at the end of the day because you’re doing it right. You’re also satisfied because you stole a pie from the Arundel bakery and split it with Michael and a pony in the stables, and Polly didn’t catch you.

Epilogue: When Tommy comes home, Polly’s more than happy to let him take over the blasted business, as long as it keeps his restless mind busy, and as long as he doesn’t fuck up. But you’ve been at this too long, gotten too good at it, to just go off and be a factory worker again. One day, Tommy calls you into his office and tells you there can only be one mad dog of a lieutenant around. Right, you say, so let Arthur take his fucking medicine. Tommy tells you that if you back off, you’ll eventually get your happily ever after with Polly in some country house somewhere, with Michael, and he’ll give you his blessing. His blessing, like you need it. You laugh in his face, leap over the desk, and fall to the ground with him in a mess of limbs, wrestling. Hardest nine minutes of your life, but at the ten minute mark, you’ve got him pinned. You ask him if he thinks Arthur could do that; he says maybe, because he’s a habitual liar. You ask him what time the Kimber raid is; he says nine-thirty. You ask him if he’s gonna slit your throat in the night for this; he says no. Lovely, you say, and peel yourself off him, and take your bruised face back over to the Garrison to grab a handful of ice. Polly’s there, interviewing some barmaid, and when you tell her what happened, she laughs so hard she has to grab the bar for support.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I’m not even gonna try and pretend that I don’t have favorites. I love #146/Polly SO FUCKIN MUCH.


	6. #147: Ada Thorne, Danny Whiz-Bang, Tommy Shelby

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Ada Thorne

(after Freddie’s death, before s2)

[Originally posted by captainedamerica](https://tmblr.co/Z9TTwx29Abe9N)

You’ve been keeping up a correspondence with Ada for years now ever since she sent you an admiring letter about your first book, a Marxist analysis of housing issues. By the time you reach London on business, your letters have long strayed from ideological into personal. Still, when you first see her giving an impromptu speech at a national meeting, you’re still struck by how electric she is in person, how lovely. With years of buildup and one whiskey as an excuse, you go home with her, make up for lost time, make out a lot, and talk till dawn.

Unexpected Bonus: You lend your intellectual cachet to Ada’s bid for a seat at the table of London’s communist leadership. Together, you and Ada successfully beat down all arguments to the contrary (which are mostly, at the core, veiled protests: but she’s a woman!) To celebrate, instead of going out for drinks, she puts her old lockpicking skills to use and takes you climbing all the way up a massive church tower, where the two of you can watch the sun set.

* * *

## Danny Whiz-Bang

(before s1)

Danny’s such a quiet, thoughtful boy, of course you like him, but you’ve got your head in the clouds half the time. It takes you forever to realize that the knights and heroes in your stories are all starting to look an awful lot like him: the generous shape of his grin, the eagerness to help, the belly laughs. He loves reading your stories, so you give him a novel dedicated to him. Four hours later, he shows up dressed as the protagonist, carrying wildflowers, and God the two of you are goofy but you can’t be arsed to care.

Unexpected Bonus: A shrapnel wound in the leg brings Danny home much earlier than you expecting, limping badly, but whole and safe nonetheless. You’re thrilled and relieved, but also a little worried; you’ve got yourself a war-baby, a dead cousin’s three-month-old, stranded with you, and you’ve gotten so attached to the little thing you want to adopt it. Danny’s recovering and can’t get a job and having enough trouble as it is, but he doesn’t object to having the baby around; on the contrary, he tells you to teach him how to do diapers on his first day back. You still can’t for the life of you figure out how to ask him if you can adopt. After less than a week, you and he have a hellish night trying to get little Jimmy to sleep, and when Jimmy finally snores, Danny looks up at you and says, “Love, can we keep him?” You burst into tears of relief, which wakes Jimmy up again, and Danny hugs you and picks up the baby and laughs. “It’s going to be all right.” And it’s going to be more than all right. It’s going to be wonderful.

* * *

## Tommy Shelby

(s4 AU)

[Originally posted by writtieninthestars](https://tmblr.co/Zrnx7b2YTqOv4)

You’re the cousin that Johnny Dogs said would make Tommy’s life hell, and you have a grudge against the Changrettas for once shooting your dad while conducting a robbery. This is enough for you to claim the position of head of the Lee soldiers, and your strategic skills soon let lay claim to the position of Tommy’s lieutenant. You’re one of a rare few who can match and understand Tommy’s mind, and yet you’re quieter than he is, steadier. After long tactical discussions, often you’ll just sit with him, smoking in silence. In time, you lay claim to his heart.

Unexpected Bonus: Polly doesn’t like you at first, of course, but when she finds out that Luca has made Michael party to her false deception, potentially pitting cousin against cousin, she turns to you. You figure out a way to assassinate Luca without ever having that happen, and once Luca’s dead, the remainder of the Italians, who don’t have a personal vendetta against the Shelbys, head back to America. Polly’s so appreciative that she gives you the entire honest scoop on Tommy, head to toe, ugly bits, but childhood pranks too. When you see Tommy the next day, you simply tell him that you’ll be staying at the Shelby estate for the foreseeable future. He only hums in acknowledgement, but he can’t stop smiling, even while pretending to read the newspaper. Later, much, much later, he’ll tell you he was prepared to follow you into the fucking woods and do courtship there if he had to, and you’ll laugh and call him a liar. Of course I’m a liar, he’ll say, but not about this. And you’ll know it to be true.


	7. #148: Michael Gray, Esme Shelby, Tommy Shelby

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## Michael Gray 

(after s4)

[Originally posted by peachyblinders](https://tmblr.co/ZZ1PXd2VtGBB8)

Though you meet Michael at a riotous party full of some of New York’s most acclaimed luminaries, you’re the only one who can see through his façade; despite the women and the money and the glamor, America is a gilded cage for Michael. You know he’s attracted to you, but you do nothing about it; he’s a ruthless killer, after all, and yet when you see a waiter slip something into his drink, you abandon the last of the fucks you had to give and save him. You find yourself the only person in the whole country he actually trusts.

Unexpected Bonus: It’s the first time in forever that Michael’s actually pursued someone that he wants, someone that isn’t quite sure that they want them back. Not knowing exactly what to do, he sticks to the script of very traditional romances in a way that’s hilarious to watch, especially since he’s someone who’s not used to following rules basically ever. He tries to get your family’s approval, but as someone used to bribing his way through New York’s political system, he starts off on the wrong foot by buying your parents, who like watching races, a literal horse. It takes you a solid two weeks after that to convince them that he’s not a solid gold asshole, but that’s alright. At least it was funny. That and the roses and chocolate you enjoy; you draw the line at bad poetry, and then, as he mutters something about liking to see you write anything better, you shut him up with a kiss.

* * *

## Esme Shelby 

(after s4)

[Originally posted by captainedamerica](https://tmblr.co/Z9TTwx28i5evb)

When Esme’s youngest comes down with a serious flu, she reluctantly returns to Birmingham. She shuns the Shelbys, but takes a bit of help from you because you both served as nurses during WWI, and you’re old friends. Even worn to the bone and stressed out of her mind, Esme is as articulate, scorching, beautiful, and strong as ever, and even when the kid gets better, you keep hanging around. She doesn’t seem to mind; on the contrary, after a year of you coming around, she proposes to you, which seems to be a mark of something more than gratitude…

Unexpected Bonus: Esme doesn’t talk a lot about her feelings with you, although you sense that there’s a lot between the two of you, until you take her to meet your parents. Your dad, after a few too many drinks, starts to ask her wildly personal questions, questions about the Shelbys, about John, about whether she’s really in love with you. You try to jump in, but Esme motions you aside and answers every single question in detail, with a calmness that belies the passion underneath. You’re the only reason she went from hating this shit city to almost liking it, she says. You’re getting married with or without him at the ceremony, she says. Good on you, your dad says, and hands her a bottle of his favorite vintage when the two of you are on the way out.

* * *

## Tommy Shelby 

(after s3)

[Originally posted by writtieninthestars](https://tmblr.co/Zrnx7b2W8POXR)

Your brother Curly is worried about his friend Tommy Shelby. The reclusive gangster ordered all his servants out and isn’t expected to last the year. As a favor to Curly, you ride out to the estate and try to kick some sense into Tommy. This escalates into a shouting match, then slides into a tense pause while Charlie toddles in to display his toy horse. Tommy argues with you day and night as you get the estate in order, reach out to his brothers, and oversee an increase in Charlie’s vegetable consumption. But he never tells you to go away.

Unexpected Bonus: Long after you’ve gotten past the “just doing my brother a favor” stage, even past the “co-master of the estate” stage and the “got the family back together” stage of things, you’re pretty sure that Tommy appreciates you, maybe enjoys your company sometimes, but mostly just spars with you like the evil brother you never had (Curly was always a sweetheart). Then you receive a threatening letter in the mail and he springs into action. You appreciate this, of course, but it doesn’t make sense. Why you, and not, say, Polly or Arthur?

“Isn’t it obvious?” he says, as if you’re merely discussing the fucking stock exchange or something. “I’d be dead without you.”

“Tommy Shelby. Is that sentiment?”

He reaches out and cups your cheek. “I’m afraid so.”


	8. #156: Tatiana Petrovna, Michael Gray, Grace Burgess

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Tatiana Petrovna

(before s3)

[Originally posted by daiecooper](https://tmblr.co/ZCLzKl26nYktj)

The year is 1917, and you’re a Russian train station security guard bored out of your mind. You strike up a fascinating conversation with the only woman waiting for the train, but it’s cut short when a couple men run in, searching. Trying to hide, she kisses you; failing that, she shoots them and then continues the conversation as if nothing had happened. When the gunshots draw a third, you shoot that one yourself, annoyed at the interruption. She offers to take you with her on the train. You’re young, you’re dumb, and you’ve got nothing to lose. You accept.

Unexpected Bonus: “Prank” isn’t the right word for it. Tatiana is a mistress of her art, and regardless of subject, location, or consequences, she’ll visit holy hell on her target in a way that makes you equal parts awed and terrified. When, in the 60s, author Mario Puzo will begin doing research for his gangster epic The Godfather, he’ll be quite taken by a New York rumor that a gangster king once had a horse head planted in a man’s bed to threaten him, and Mario will put that in his book. Thing is, it wasn’t a gangster, it was Tatiana. It wasn’t a threat, it was a prank. And it wasn’t a horse’s head.

* * *

## Michael Gray

(s3 AU; Michael left in s2 when Polly offered him the money)

[Originally posted by peachyblinders](https://tmblr.co/ZZ1PXd2VtGBB8)

When your best friend Michael hears from his mum that Father Hughes has gotten mixed up in Shelby business, he goes back to the city of his birth to right old wrongs, and you follow. The family doesn’t trust you or Michael, and he doesn’t tell them why he’s come back, but that doesn’t matter. You’re going to get that fucking revenge with or without their help. Amidst all the blood and deception, a close shave teaches Michael how much you mean to him, and you’re left to grapple with the possibility that maybe there’s more between you than friendship.

Unexpected Bonus: When it’s all over, Michael returns to the home of his adopted family. Unable to face his mother after just having killed a man, he waits until they’ve gone off to church for Sunday morning, then does a few chores around the farm. You’re not much help, but you can at least split wood and watch him move about the yard. You can imagine what he looked like when he was younger, and maybe a little happier. He leaves the money in the mailbox and both of you slip away before his family returns, retreating to a hidden stream a few miles south, taking off your shoes to dip your feet in the clear water. You can feel something in him unwinding. You can hold his hand. You’re his family now.

* * *

## Grace Burgess

(after s2 AU)

[Originally posted by peakyblinded](https://tmblr.co/Z6ajap2KuzMSl)

You’re delighted to find a fellow-countrywoman in the frothy and seemingly soulless mess that is New York’s elite social scene. It’s inconvenient that she’s an ex-cop, seeing as you’re a con artist of the highest order (your crest, family title—it’s all fake), but she’s frankly so bored that you suspect she lets you keep up the game just to see what happens. You’re supposed to have disappeared a week ago with all of Mrs. Doherty’s money, but you can’t face starting over again in another city with another set of vapid strangers. So continues the game of cat and mouse.

Unexpected Bonus: You don’t trust her any further than you can throw her, and vice versa; there’s something almost comforting about that, finding a kindred spirit. You delight in trying to push her buttons, in failing to see past her façade, with a craftsman’s appreciation of it all. It’s by pure chance that you find the one chink in her armor, a second-rate speakeasy dangerously close to the Italian border of Bowery. When you see her there, at first you can’t believe your luck: with her blonde hair tucked under a hat and her usual glamorous dress replaced by gray trousers, striped suspenders, and white shirt, she looks striking in entirely a new way. But then she begins to sing, and there’s more than talent there. She sings like she knows sorrow. That’s outside the bounds of the game, and as her eyes meet yours through the crowd, you know that this is all going to end, one way or another.


	9. #157: Arthur Shelby, Charlotte Murray, May Carleton

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Arthur Shelby

(s2 AU)

[Originally posted by jacnaylor](https://tmblr.co/Zkl4Rx2UJ9u7r)

Your particular genius for chemistry has allowed you to become a rich hermit. When Arthur comes to you for advice on making explosives, you agree to teach him a few things. At first, you’re merely curious about him, but his rough kindness grows on you, he reveres your intelligence, and you both appreciate each other’s no-bullshit attitude. He shows up miserable and hungover often, and finally you offer him a way out of the family business that’s killing him: live with you. At first, he’s a horrible housekeeper. In a few months, after your own fashion, you’re both very happy.

Unexpected Bonus: Arthur’s PTSD is fucking terrible, you’re not going to deny that, but there are some good ways that you and he try to cope with it. If he’s restless after a nightmare, unable to sleep, you’ll climb up to the roof with him and point out the constellations. If he misses his family, his mum in particular (he’s the only Shelby that was there for her death), he’ll make pancakes with her recipe. If he’s got an excess of pent-up, violent energy, he’ll take it out back to chop wood. If he longs for the energy of a night out, you’ll take him dancing instead of drinking. And if he asks, you’ll set your work aside for half an hour, take him into the back garden, and sit there under the vined archway with him, talking with him about everything and nothing between kisses.

* * *

## Charlotte Murray

(after s3)

With your calculating mind and knowledge of anatomy, you’re the go-to for wealthy women looking for ways out of their terrible relationship. After being controlled by overbearing parents, left by some asshole at an abortionist’s, and emotionally abused by her new husband, Charlotte’s not having this shit anymore. After you work together, she gets such a taste for murder that she offers to become your full-time accomplice, under the guise of a flatshare. You think about her bright, mischievous eyes, her admiration, her unbroken sense of fun, and tell her there’s only one bed. She grins and repeats the offer.

Unexpected Bonus: You don’t fully realize it until she moves in with you, but this girl loves to party! She seems to know everybody, and when you take your murderous gig on the road, she still manages to find underground speakeasies as far away as Chicago in the States. It’s fucking wild, the way she can sniff out a good place to have a dance in literally any neighborhood. But she always gets horribly tired afterwards, and sometimes you have to carry from the cab to your hotel room. Always, she likes to curl into you like a cat, while you wipe the makeup from her face and gently dress her in her ridiculously pink and polka-dotted pyjamas.

* * *

## May Carleton

(post s2)

[Originally posted by shelbydingle](https://tmblr.co/Zb7T7l2WvU2VF)

You’ve been watching the delicate, beautiful Lady Carleton from afar at Racing Board meetings for years now, but you never really see your chance until she literally walks up to you after a meeting and asks you, polite but point-blank, when you’re going to buy her dinner. The lady does not fuck around, figuratively speaking. Literally speaking, she does bed you on the first date, but true intimacy with her takes much, much longer. It’s a lot of long rides, a lot of wistful silences, before she ever kisses you like it means something. But the wait’s well worth it.

Unexpected Bonus: As part of her education as a lady, May was taught how to play the piano, and though she doesn’t do it much nowadays, she still has a great love of music. When the servants are to sleep and she doesn’t want to be alone, but she doesn’t want to talk either, she’ll run her fingers through your hair and sing to you. Her voice has a way of making even the simplest lullaby seem like the incantation of some ethereal woodland elf; there’s something a little wild about the woman that no amount of gilded frames will be able to contain, and you love that.


	10. #158: Bonnie Gold, Polly Gray, Ben Younger

## Ride Or Die

You are there one hundred percent there for your partner, no matter who or what gets in your way. Outsiders should never mistake your loyalty for blindness – you DO speak your mind when you have disagreements – but you’ll never allow public disagreements to put a dent in your reputation. You accept that your partner may have flaws, regrets, mistakes, and heartache, and you’re there for them when they need you, and they are very lucky to have you. Whether it’s crime, politics, or family business, you’re in all the way. Things may get a little wild, but you love it!

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## Bonnie Gold

(post s4)

[Originally posted by darkdaze76](https://tmblr.co/Z1ZPBi2SHbjVj)

Meeting Bonnie Gold for business is nothing but a pleasure. Trying to recruit new clientele for your dad’s ratty old London gym, you read Bonnie with your quick eye and give him the hard sell in less than five minutes: you can use your family’s generations’ worth of connections to get him into any fight, and once he gets there, he can figure out the rest. He admires your understanding of the situation and vast network of connections, but first makes you promise that if he joins your gym, he won’t be precluded from dating you. It’s an easy yes.

Unexpected Bonus: Bonnie always has trouble calming down after a fight, even after you’ve treated his hands, eased him into an ice bath. There’s a slow way to deal with this, and there’s a quick way: the slow way is to exchange long, winding stories with him while he rests his head in your lap, telling him about your childhood growing up in the gym, hearing about his rambling out on the open road.

[nsfw] The quick way is sex. Positioning yourself above him, one hand steadying yourself, his collarbone cutting into your palm, your fingertips digging into his muscles, snapping your hips at a pace that leaves him with little to do but grip your hips and pant your name.

* * *

## Polly Gray

(after s4, Polly takes over the business AU)

[Originally posted by fockingshelby](https://tmblr.co/Zp4Csa2YGR9ex)

Polly was your girlfriend back in the bad old days, when she and you and her sister and your cousin lot broke into the museum, cooked up moonshine, and went for joyrides on stolen horses. Family obligations called you away to Ireland for a long, long time, but when you come back, you’re still in love with her. She welcomes you back with a thousand warnings, but fuck that. You won’t have her a second Tommy, worked to the bone; you make home an oasis for her, brush her hair at night, keep all her secrets. Good habits die hard.

Unexpected Bonus: When your sister comes back into town, you and Polly get the remnants of the old gang together, plus some new friends, forming the most powerful unofficial club in the entire city. Never has tea been quite so deadly. Tommy avoids the teas assiduously; Arthur occasionally stumbles in to be lovingly roasted; Finn darts in to get at the refreshments and is quizzed about his love life; Ada glories in it all; and various Shelby babies of every age toddle, crawl, and scream, or else are passed from hand to hand. You’re the tacitly accepted ruler of these salons, because you navigate every social situation with the adroitness of a trained diplomat. Also because your blueberry scones are the stuff of legend.

* * *

## Colonel Ben Younger

(post s4 AU)

(image credit [cursv](http://cursve.tumblr.com/post/168629705391/why-is-nobody-talking-about-colonel-ben-younger-in))

As one of the only member of the Birmingham City Council that didn’t support Tommy Shelby’s candidacy, you’re in trouble; he takes it personally and threatens your life. The police are useless, but the handsome Colonel Younger offers you protection in an unusual form: he needs a spouse to appear electable. Together, you and he campaign like mad, and he wins by only 183 votes. Afterwards, he offers to get a divorce in a few years, but you’ve been enjoying his easy smiles, his genuine generosity, and his strategic mind so much that you decline the offer. He is delighted.

Unexpected Bonus: With your City Council contacts and ability to persuade, and your husband’s military contacts and position in the national government, you’re able to clean out Birmingham’s corrupt police. One side effect of this is that the Shelby crime family, now exposed, takes a hard hit from an up-and-coming local gang, the Carrs, and you and your husband are sitting pretty atop Birmingham’s power structure. Is drinking champagne on the day of Tommy Shelby’s death mean-spirited? Yeah, but it’s also fucking delicious.


	11. #236: Tommy Shelby, Linda Shelby, Jessie Eden

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint – after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive – but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

Examples: Jessie Eden, Jeremiah Jesus

* * *

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Tommy Shelby

(s1 AU: Grace is needed in an Irish infiltration; Campbell sends someone else to spy on the Shelby family)

[Originally posted by andallthoseothercliches](https://tmblr.co/ZQ7Run2OqEQzY)

When you returned from the war, a fit of anger cost you the first job available, so you formed a veterans’ group informally called  the “let’s not die club”. Tommy attended occasionally, and your homes weren’t far apart, so you walked with him. When he finally talked honestly, it was with an aching clarity that both terrified you and drew you in. 2am telephone panic turned into the occasional daylight visit turned into sleeping on the sofa when you couldn’t make rent turned into tacit friendship turned into something so soft, his arm slung across your chest, keeping you close.

Unexpected bonus: You avoid his family, his business; all that is a fast run down a dark path. You know what he does and it’s not right but you won’t give him up, so you focus on your work and he never brings his into your flat and that’s alright, except one day you oversleep in his room and come downstairs and there’s John, raiding the fridge, and John doesn’t even act surprised, just chats you up, all friendly, till you let your guard down, till you ask him about Tommy before the war. Later, much later, you tell Tommy about it, you demand that he do “the voices”, and he refuses, so you try, imitating your fellow veterans so badly that he ends up laughing so hard he coughs. Then he gives it a go, and he’s much better, should have been in the fucking theater. Now, when you or he are feeling down, you’ll give “the voices” a try. It never fails to bring a smile to your face.

* * *

## Linda Shelby

(ww1 AU)

[Originally posted by jacnaylor](https://tmblr.co/Zkl4Rx2UL6iBs)

Linda was both the first Quaker you’d ever met and the strangest woman you’d ever met. As an ambulance driver, you tried to shut your feelings down, but as a nurse, she always seemed fiercely open. She saw the kindness in you, and she told you to protect it, not kill it; what you thought a weakness, she thought a treasure. She brightened your days with cheerful ramblings on everything from Rufus Jones’s writings on mysticism to the best way to make a sourdough starter. By the end of the war, you wanted to marry her. Amazingly, so did she.

Unexpected bonus: Linda’s friends, who were mostly other Quakers who were looked down on for marrying out of meeting, were also some of the strangest people you’d ever met; they welcomed you with warmth and enthusiasm, so that after the war, you found you and Linda bouncing around in a massive constellation of volunteer groups, book clubs, and potlucks, which left you extremely well-fed, somewhat bewildered, and happy.

Unexpected bonus #2: Linda followed her dream of becoming a missionary and assisted one of her theological heroes, Pearl S. Buck, in producing the Hocking report of 1932, which recommended that missions groups transfer power to local authorities, shift focus away from pure evangelization, focus more on education and welfare, and respect local religions. Linda and some of the younger, post-WWI generation had more or less had it up to here with cultural imperialism. You had very little to do with the report, but you did get to tag along and eat a lot of Chinese food, which was….exquisite. To this day, you still have dreams about the beef ho fun noodles.

(Author’s note: I am Chinese. If you ever have the chance to eat Cantonese beef ho fun, eat it. That is the best life advice I can give you.)

* * *

## Jessie Eden

(pre-s4 AU)

[Originally posted by dellesayah](https://tmblr.co/ZQ-MCu2SzlGdR)

Your friend asked you to teach Jessie Eden some self-defense in anticipation of a difficult strike. You were reluctant. You already had busy days from your job and your volunteer work teaching classes, but when you met Jessie, she was so beautiful you immediately pocketed all your objections. In lesson one, she elbowed you in the face, faster than you’d expected. Lesson two, she made you laugh at a Pankhurst joke. Lesson three, you told her couldn’t teach her, because professionalism was out the window. Lesson four, she straddled you and kissed you dizzy. Lesson twenty-one, you moved in together.

Unexpected bonus: Jessie loves music, and you love Jessie, so if you ever have Saturday or Sunday morning free, you two like to wander the city, scouring secondhand shops for cheap used records. It’s a great way to explore, and you feel confident you can keep her safe. You try to visit new places every time, but afterwards, you usually end up at the same pub, and no matter what you get, she always takes food off your plate. Even salad.


	12. #237: Ada Shelby, Jeremiah Jesus, Grace Burgess

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint—after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive—but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

Examples: Jessie Eden, Jeremiah Jesus

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Ada Shelby

(s1 AU: Freddie meets someone in France & stays there)

[Originally posted by captainedamerica](https://tmblr.co/Z9TTwx29Abe9N)

As the youngest professor in your university and hellbent on municipal education reform, you have a lot to lose. Nevertheless, when one of your fellow professors quietly asks you to hide and house a renegade communist, you agree at once; you have enough experience with Birmingham’s corrupt and sometimes cruel police force to know that turning a communist over to them would be flat-out wrong. Your flat is small, and there is—and I cannot emphasize this enough—only one bed. You love how vivacious she is, and she loves how thoughtful you are. (And there’s only one bed!) Wedding bells follow.

Unexpected bonus: Ada, being bi herself, has deep connections to the queer community. When you get a different position as a professor in London and can finally afford it, you two move to a big flat, which she uses to throw q&a parties that are absolute bangers. Now, is this kind of dangerous? Maybe! But your wife is Ada fucking Shelby. You think she cares? Anyways, Josephine Baker shows up more than once. Do with that information what you will.

* * *

## Jeremiah Jesus

(between s2 and s3)

[Originally posted by awhoreslies](https://tmblr.co/ZWLbkw1e_7V0Q)

You’ve always liked to argue. Not because you’re cruel, but because it’s like a sport, and you like the skill it takes. That’s probably why you end up arguing with the street preacher on your way to work as curator of the museum every day. He’s so damn good-humored, not even your most irreverent jokes ever seem to annoy you; on the contrary, you become good friends. You keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it never does; he’s exactly what he seems to be, a man who actually gives a damn, and you love him for that.

Unexpected bonus: When a flash flood hits, the museum sump pump breaks and you call everyone in a panic, expecting that maybe half a dozen people will show up for you to help you carry the most important pieces to the upstairs storage attic. Instead, Jeremiah shows up fifteen minutes later with a literal gang of the roughest-looking men you’d ever seen. He must have said something to them, though, because they were also the politest group of men you’ve ever encountered, verbally anyways. Out of the corner of your eye, you do see one or two of them eyeing you, not disgustingly, but speculatively. When you’ve saved all you can and the water has reached knee-height, all the men go away, save for the notorious Tommy Shelby, who merely says, “You’d better wait until May for the wedding. I won’t have the Irish business wrapped up till then. Pleasure to meet you.” Whereupon you turn to Jeremiah, who says, “I haven’t proposed yet!” and Tommy, looking faintly guilty, flees. Jeremiah proposes on the spot. The water’s too high for him to kneel anyway, so you kiss instead, the sounds of water echoing around you in the empty, flooded museum.

* * *

## Grace Burgess

(post-s1 AU)

[Originally posted by mollysmoonweaver](https://tmblr.co/ZS2bSh2UNN6ty)

You’re drunk at at the a party for new mayor of New York when you meet her. She’s such a good listener, you tell her about your crooked boss’s scheme to fuck over his tenants. Next morning, she shows up at your office. You think you’re busted, but she gets herself hired. Together, you find a way to steal his secret records and leak them to the Times. When it’s all over, you take Grace out  for celebratory drinks. You ask her why she helped you, she smiles and says, “I was getting bored.” And then: “Also—” And kisses you.

Unexpected bonus: Grace spent so long pretending to be someone else, so long living in little one-person flats, mostly empty, waiting to move on, that when she finally has a place of her own, with you, she goes wild, trying out different aesthetics and taking you all around the city to thrift shops and boutiques. You acquiesce, but only if she’ll teach you some of her spy tricks, and she does, showing you how to use a combo of makeup and wardrobe. That’s how you end up on Saturdays dressing up as completely different people and going out to eat at the same places, seeing if you can trick the waitstaff. Invariably, she does. You’re the weak link in the operation, too cerebral for good sustained lying, always trying to double-check your own lies against themselves, but Grace just laughs and says that’s part of the fun. And you’ll do anything to hear her laugh.


	13. #238: Jessie Eden, Ben Younger, Alfie Solomons

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Equality For Everyone

You believe in basic goodness and human rights for all, and you try to live that in your everyday life. This doesn’t mean you’re a total saint – after all, everyone’s got to have a little bit of asshole in them in order to survive – but you try, and trying is half the battle. This makes you a rare jewel in Birmingham. Even if people don’t realize it at first, they eventually find that your belief in justice and kindness makes you a really refreshing person to be around. Even those who don’t share your convictions are forced to respect them.

Examples: Jessie Eden, Jeremiah Jesus

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## Jessie Eden

(post-s4 AU)

[Originally posted by oberelias](https://tmblr.co/Z8lEQy2SXs_Zt)

You’ve always had a crush on Jessie Eden. Your professional paths cross often through through your hardscrabble work as a lawyer for the same tenants that she organizes. But you never think she notices you, until one day you’re dragged before local party leaders and accused of leaking information to the police. Jessie defends you, then drives down to the Shelby estate and gives the real snitch, Tommy, the shouting match of his life. In the ensuing political battle, Tommy loses the race for Parliament and you successfully defend Jessie against charges of treason. Guess she noticed you after all.

Unexpected Bonus: Jessie, not much of one for church, always minds her aunt’s flower shop on Sunday mornings, and it’s your favorite time of the week. You talk out your arguments for upcoming court cases and she gets this glowing look in her eyes, seeing you at your full persuasive power. Sometimes you do vice versa with her and her upcoming speeches. Sometimes you don’t talk at all, half-hidden behind a screen of flowers in the back room, kissing her slowly with the smell of sweet pea and jasmine thick in the air.

* * *

## Colonel Ben Younger

(post-WWI)

There’s just so much unnecessary pain caused by goddamn incompetence. The war taught you that much. When Ben comes back to you after four long years, you’re startled and relieved to find that you’ve both grown in the same way, found the same mission. Politics, especially military politics, are dirtier than a foxhole after three days of rain, but with Ben at your side, you can do anything. After the war, nothing feels safe but him, the way he’s young and hungry and beside you every at every step. The way he still kisses you like he’s just come home.

Unexpected Bonus: Even when you start gaining influence, it’s still an enormous amount of work to build and maintain the social networks of power, especially since Ben’s black in a city that still has plenty of gentlemen’s clubs full to the brim with politicians (and fucking Tommy Shelby) and yet not a single man of color allowed. (If you’re a person of color too, fuck, that’s a lot of work.) But when the lavish dinner is over, and your throat is sore from talking, your clothes a little sweaty, all the guests gone, you two sit in the ruins of the feast and eat like ravening wolves, having spent the entire party making conversation. Other days, when you don’t need to keep up a front, you’ll eat rice and butcher’s scraps, slightly stale bread, whatever, but on these feast days, it goes the fuck down. Full-on bonbon mayhem! The best treat of all is seeing the future General sprawled out on the sofa, suit unbuttoned, a smear of icing on his chin. You’ve never laughed harder.

* * *

## Alfie Solomons

(post-s2)

[Originally posted by tommyshhelby](https://tmblr.co/Ztk8sa2VYkBe4)

After your father’s death, your relatives marry you off within the year. You’re expecting to fight the gangster, but instead he sits you down and draws up a contract between the two of you, humming and hawing, oddly harmless. You do nothing for a week, and he never complains, and then you, bored, go at housewifely duties with all the pent-up fury of a bored woman, which is to say, the house gleams and the roast is melt-in-your-mouth good. When he offers you a few orgasms by way of thanks for a good job, who are you to say no?

Unexpected Bonus: When you tell Alfie about your Parisian childhood, he offers to take you there for the honeymoon, and of course you say yes. You have a rip-roaring time with all your childhood buddies and your father’s friends. Dad was a Dreyfusard, so most of them have no problem with Alfie, and you even get to meet Sarah Bernhardt at some dinner party. Best of all, though, is when you take him on a row down the Seine at sunset, and you point out all your favorite spots in the city to him. He curses and harrumphs about his own inability to row, but then he lets you row, and by the time the stars come out, neither of you is rowing. It’s too good an opportunity to waste on not kissing.


	14. #246: Johnny Dogs, Polly Gray, John Shelby

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Johnny Dogs

(s4)

You’ve been with Johnny since time out of mind, seen him turn from a crack-toothed boy into a man. There’s been  plenty of blood, but he still keeps the same grin. You love him for that, the way he brings sunshine wherever he goes, no matter what. When it comes down to it, your marriage is mostly built on the way you can’t bear to think of going through life without it. And fuck, he’s a good husband: it’s halves always, minding the kids together, frying the fish together, emptying the bottle together, burying the bodies together. Life is good.

Unexpected Bonus: Johnny has an excellent memory, and after a life on the road, he’s put it to good use collecting all manner of marvelous tales, some of them patently fantastical, and some of them believable (but just as entertaining): magical horses, historic speeches, airplane rides, family feuds. One of your favorite things to do is to pick a significant event in both your lives and have him retell it from his perspective. Inevitably, there’s some little detail about you that you don’t even remember from that time, but he’s remembered it, because it’s important to him: the green ribbon you had in your hair, the way you howled with laughter at your mother’s dirty jokes. That’s how, after so many years, you can tell he’s still as in love with you as when you first met.

* * *

## May Carleton

(post-WWI AU)

[Originally posted by pcllygray](https://tmblr.co/Z8nHnc2TDII0a)

At a holiday party at the Carleton estate, Lady Carleton introduces herself (“Call me May”). She wants to hear about your life as an officer, needs closure for her husband. The army’s been like a family for you, so of course you say yes. Turns out you needed someone to talk to someone too, and and she’s a good listener. Her clear brown eyes are at once vulnerable and self-aware in a rare way you find captivating. The estate is pretty far from everywhere else, and you’re a little drunk. It’s sufficient excuse to stay the night. She smells like lavender.

Unexpected Bonus: While May herself is quiet, she’s never boring; she slips between extremely different environments so easily that you almost don’t notice that she’s doing it. She’ll go from the stables to a winter ball with only an hour in-between, and look just as comfortable in both places. Perhaps it’s because she’s run out of fucks to give, in her own way. Anyhow, you’re more than relieved to take her back to your family and discover that they love her. There’s something about her quiet confidence that settles you, too, and when you find yourself calmly saying hello to the King at some extravagant holiday do, you manage to carry the conversation as well as you would with any superior officer. It’s a weird year. But it’s a good year.

* * *

## John Shelby

(s1 AU)

[Originally posted by peakyrach](https://tmblr.co/ZO3Tab2V0b7zS)

When you sign up to be a Blinder, you’re embarrassed to find out that your one-night stand from before the war is actually John Shelby. Thankfully, with Tommy at the top, John isn’t really your boss so much as he is your brother-in-arms. That said, there’s nothing brotherly about the way you catch him looking at you after your first first together, still panting in a way that can’t help but bring back memories. And then he head to the back of the pub, to the bathroom, and—alright, yeah. He looks over his shoulder. You get up and follow him.

Unexpected Bonus: When you get a spare minute, you’re always over at John’s house. He bought it cheap so the kids would have space to run and play, but it’s so run-down it’s nearly useless, so you two spend a ton of time with hammer or saw in hand. It’s sweaty work but that’s not so bad, watching him work with his shirtsleeves rolled up. When there’s a decently safe job, he’ll bring the kids along and they’ll swarm you, tugging at your shirt, climbing up onto your back, using you as a piece of furniture occasionally. It’s their automatic acceptance of you, cheery and unabashed, that sets you at ease enough to let John drag you to family meetings after a while. Polly allows it, so. When the house is all finished and brand new, you’re not surprised when John invites you to share his room for good.


	15. #247: Freddie Thorne, Alfie Solomons, Esme Shelby

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Freddie Thorne

(post-WWI AU)

[Originally posted by turibulum](https://tmblr.co/ZidoUyy31QBC)

Over the course of the war, you set up a massive network of loosely connected leftists, to hide conscientious objectors, communists, and the like from London police. Your near-eidetic memory and fierce personal honor towards your friends are sometimes the only things holding the network together, and this inspires fierce loyalty from your friends, enmity from the Met, and awe, apparently, from Freddie Thorne. At first, you’re suspicious of the Peaky associate, but after a while, you’re so charmed by his rakish charm, nimble mind, and genuine goodwill that you acquiesce to a long courtship.

Unexpected Bonus: You’re not the only one who can play the long game. On your first official date, Freddie brings you a used copy of Coriolanus that he picked up at a secondhand shop. Though it’s not your favorite Shakespeare play, you’re taken with the little actor’s notes in the margins, and Freddie brings you books every now and then. The morning after your first kiss, the time after he disappears for a few days, evading the police, the conclusion of a successful strike. When you finally start stacking books on the floor, he casually suggests that you two move in together, for the sake of better shelf space. You give him a look and he breaks out into a smile that destroys any possibility of the book pileup being a coincidence.

* * *

## Alfie Solomons

(post s2 AU)

[Originally posted by tommyshhelby](https://tmblr.co/Ztk8sa2VYkBe4)

You have an absurdly prodigious talent for fucking about with numbers, more than one powerful corporate titan on your tail as a result, and a family to protect. Alfie Solomons has a rapidly expanding territory in need of a cash infusion, a “meh” approach to the law, and plenty of security forces at his disposal. It’s a great business deal on paper, but in person it’s even better; the both of you start flirting with such shamelessness that Ollie actually blushes and tries to manufacture a reason to leave the room. There’s just something completely infectious about Alfie’s shit-eating grin.

Unexpected Bonus: Alfie doesn’t do normal dates. They’re all at one end or the other of the spectrum of wild dates: either ridiculous with some element of business, violence, or deception involved, or lazy and domestic and private. Exhibit A: Alfie pretending to be a Gentile to get into a private poker game, getting endless tips from you (you’re counting cards, obviously), and making half a dozen offhanded comments to the various lords there that could certainly be taken as insults if thought about in the right light. Exhibit B: Alfie frying up eggs for breakfast-as-dinner, not bothering to put on pants, then flopping down on the bed afterwards and arguing with you over the finer points of Sun Tzu till he falls asleep.  

* * *

## Esme Shelby

(pre-s1 AU)

[Originally posted by divialexifilius](https://tmblr.co/ZWy-_k2Zy9ONd)

When the owners of the Black Patch try to evict the Romani community there, Esme recruits you to defend her and her family. As a hotshot lawyer, this definitely isn’t your first eviction case, but it’s the first case you’ve had in a long time that makes you really care, the money aside, the victory aside, about whether or not you lose. Maybe that’s because you’re so drawn to Esme, her fiery confidence, the precision of her most vicious speeches, the intensity of her loyalty. When you win the case, she asks you to dinner with you then and there.

Unexpected Bonus: You warn Esme you have no experience with horses, but she’s adamant that if you’re gonna be together, you need to know how to ride at least a little. Somehow, this turns into a whole trip to the French countryside, borrowing a couple mares from her second cousin, and getting completely lost. Turns out she can navigate by the stars, and she takes good care of you. It’s maybe one of the most terrifying things you’ve ever done, basically putting your life in her hands, but so worth it. You tell her this on the last night, curled up by the fire, holding her, and she tells you that she trusts you, too.


	16. #248: John Shelby, Lizzie Stark, Luca Changretta

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Family First

To you, nothing is more important than the group of people that are closest to you. Since this is the 1920s, that’s probably your family, but in some circumstances, this could be your found family, your group of friends, or your community. You cherish the shared traditions, memories, and inside jokes that you have with the people you love, and you fight really hard to keep them all safe and happy.

Examples: Polly Gray, Luca Changretta

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## John Shelby

(WWI AU)

[Originally posted by peakyrach](https://tmblr.co/ZO3Tab2V0b7zS)

When the police show up at your neighbor John Shelby’s house to take his kids away, you save them by pretending to be his spouse. Martha’s been dead two months now, but you know the kids are better off with Polly than in the system. By the time he comes home, you and the kids are fast friends. You try to avoid the Shelby house, worried he’ll be angry, but he comes over with a massive bottle of whiskey as a thank-you, half drunk already, and stutters into silence. It takes him a month more to confess why: “You’re beautiful.”

(Not So) Unexpected Bonus: Katie, the oldest, rallies all the little ones. They’re determined that you and John will get together, and you don’t really have the heart to tell them that you’ve figured that out for yourselves already. So, in their own clumsy and enthusiastic way, they contrive to set you up in all kinds of romantic scenarios, and you have to pretend to be surprised–say, when the car “breaks down” when they’re “giving you a lift” to visit your mum. You and John keep it up for about two months before Jimmy, the middle kid, figures out that you’re in on the joke. Katie’s mad at you for about a day, and then her second-best friend Margo kisses her mortal enemy Jamie and she needs someone to tell about it, and John’s off doing God knows what, probably fighting someone, so she makes up with you by bringing over gingerbread in your own recipe, and just like that, you’re all friends again. John’s only complaint is that now he has to come up with his own date ideas.

* * *

## Lizzie Stark

(post-s4)

[Originally posted by paulinska44stark](https://tmblr.co/ZBi61h2SdNbCb)

You and Lizzie are childhood friends, reunited after some twenty years, and she does you a solid favor by hiring your new hostessing business for Shelby parties. Together, you two throw some of the most successful business and charity functions of the season, talking sideways and in circles around all the staff, peeking over each other’s shoulders at paperwork, and tag-team kicking Tommy’s ass when he, disgruntled and bored from studying his political papers, wanders in to critique the decorations. It’s all fun and games until you mention that you wouldn’t mind doing this forever. Then it’s a ring, too.

Unexpected Bonus: You and Lizzie share a sleep schedule that’s knocked completely out of all sense, partly due to work always running late, and partly because Ruby keeps her awake at odd hours (the nanny notwithstanding), and partly because you’ve lived alone so long, you’ve taken to just doing whatever you want. Nobody dares to mess with her, and so you wander the city, hand-in-hand, at two, or three, or four in the morning. Nobody dares to mess with her, and so sometimes a date is sitting in on Parliament and silently cracking up at the worst of the rhetoric. Nobody dares to mess with her, and so sometimes a date is interrupting recess at the Grace Shelby Institute to distribute new books. Nobody dares to mess with her, and so sometimes a date is long kisses under a white-flowering tree in the public gardens. You two have so much to see, so much to do, that shame is for other people.

* * *

## Luca Changretta

(American AU)

[Originally posted by the-shadow-of-the-father](https://tmblr.co/ZMoXXd2TeL8Bo)

They call you the Siren of Mulberry Street. Siren: your natural talent and flawless poise. Mulberry Street: ever since Luca found you, you’ve never cared to go west of Lafayette or east of Bowery. When he and his boys busted into that shitty nightclub, you fell silent till the fight was over, and then picked up where you left off; he picked up a bottle, sat down at the table closest to the stage, and didn’t leave till sunrise. Today, one of your greatest pleasures is Friday night, standing before a crowd of hundreds, singing to an audience of one.

Unexpected Bonus: Luca has some connections with the casinos and movies in Vegas, Godfather-style, through his brother Angelo, and you two have a rip-roaring time taking backstage tours and singing as a guest in some of the casinos. Luca’s not tiresomely jealous about all the attention you get; he just sits in the back and enjoys it all immensely. The trip is  particularly special because you become friends with Angelo’s English wife, bonding over your experiences as outsider wives, and when Angelo moves back to New York with you and Luca, all four of you are as thick as thieves, kids running in and out of your houses like they’re interchangeable.


	17. #256: Grace Burgess, Ruben Oliver, Alfie Solomons

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Streets & Fists

Your greatest strengths are your bravery, your instincts, and your tactical mind. In school, you were probably voted Most Likely To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse. You conduct a lot of business out in the city or in the countryside. You enjoy roaming around and getting a feel for the lay of the land. You’re also definitely good for a fight, whether that’s a full-on, bullets-blazing firefight, or a huge gathering of workers to strike. When a crisis hits, it’s your quick thinking that can get you out of pretty much any mess. People know better than to fuck with you.

* * *

## Grace Burgess

(after s1 AU: Grace enlisted in His Majesty’s Diplomatic Service to avoid both Campbell and Tommy after Tommy didn’t never showed up in either London or New York at her invitation)

[Originally posted by mollysmoonweaver](https://tmblr.co/ZS2bSh2UNN6ty)

When you were introduced to Ambassador Grace Burgess as her new bodyguard for her time in [country redacted], she merely looked at you with those clear green eyes and a faint, sardonic smile. It took her three months, but finally she accused you of being a spy. She was right, though you both worked for the same government. Today, the both of you have an understanding born of similar nightmares, hopes, and fighting instincts. You travel and learn new languages together, taste syllables you’ve never tried before first on your tongue, then on hers. Every day is a new adventure.

Unexpected Bonus: Grace rarely gets drunk, but when she does, she likes to sing, she likes to swear…and she still has diplomatic immunity. Cue the most hilarious nights out of all time, when she warbles the dirtiest possible songs in her sweet dark Irish lilt, and every English speaker in the bar stares red-cheeked at their shoes, and every non-English speaker looks confused, and you just sit there with a grin on your face and your own drink in your hand, like: “what are you gonna do about it?” When she starts singing in Irish, that’s when you know she’s a couple songs away from going home, where she sits on your lap in the dark and talks dirty to you in every language she knows.

* * *

## Ruben Oliver

(pre-s3 AU)

[Originally posted by parmachkais](https://tmblr.co/ZZSlYh2aVFIaF)

Ruben was commissioned by a nobleman to paint the scene of a famous battle. You were the general in command during that battle, and you agreed to have a few interviews with Ruben in uniform to give him a feel for the battle. He was such a good listener that you found yourself telling him everything. He was gentle with you as you sat there awkwardly in your uniform; he was gentle with you when the uniform lay in a heap on the floor. Today, he always wakes you up with a cup of hot tea and a slow kiss.

Unexpected Bonus: Your social circles are wildly different – bohemian artists and grizzled ex-soldiers – but when the alcohol flows plentiful at your house parties, labels slip away and everyone’s pretty friendly. If things get unfriendly, it usually only takes a raised eyebrow on you to quell an argument. After the rare exceptions, when you break up a fight, Ruben ends the party and takes you upstairs. Something about power being an aphrodisiac? Anyways, when your friends get along really well, sometimes they’re so friendly that they fall in love. As a result, the two of you have been mentioned in half a dozen marriage toasts, and you have plenty of godchildren to babysit on days you’re feeling domestic.

* * *

## Alfie Solomons

(after s3)

[Originally posted by tommyshhelby](https://tmblr.co/Ztk8sa2VYkBe4)

You were hired to replace the worker that Michael shot. Alfie warned you that you were just as likely to end up as a splatter of blood across his face, but you took the job anyway; working for Alfie was your best chance of making money without going gray with boredom. Congratulations, you’re never bored. Today, he loves to flirt with you in the most inappropriate circumstances: after a fight, with blood still on your hands, or in front of random clients, allies, and adversaries. Sometimes you both flirt with them (e.g. Tommy Shelby), and that’s always a hoot.

Unexpected Bonus: Alfie doesn’t escape pranks, either, though. A very classic one that takes zero effort involves buying him a puppy, which at first he thinks is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever done for him. He absolutely melts around that puppy, especially when you tell him it was the runt of the litter and needs a little extra cuddling. But then you start bringing the puppy into business meetings at random moments and ignoring Alfie’s orders to go away. It’s hilarious to watch his concentration disappear, and to hear him break off in the middle of massive monologues on the nature of humanity or what the fuck ever because the puppy just whined and he got distracted.


	18. #257: Michael Gray, May Carleton, Ada Shelby

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Paper & Brain

Your greatest strengths are your ability to strategize and your analytical mind. While others may question your decisions, you are playing a long game and you’ll see it to the end. Your skills may show themselves in business, academia, or even the arts; ultimately, your talents are not confined to one specific job. If you don’t already have a good education, you make sure to get yourself one, because you want to have as many mental tools at your disposal as possible. Nobody wants to play chess with you, but everyone feels a little safer if you’re on their side.

* * *

## Michael Gray

(throughout s2, s3, s4 AU)

[Originally posted by peakyavenger](https://tmblr.co/Z_kyTl2S82TsM)

You and Michael met at seventeen, when you were both studying accounting. Although neither of you was given to talking about your relationship much, you fell into a natural understanding, and the love letters he sent you when you moved to London were proof enough of his attachment that you weren’t surprised that he followed you there. Today, as you elbow your way to the top of the banking business, he does the same in London’s underworld. Your favorite thing about your relationship is how, in any public place, you can communicate with only a look or a raised eyebrow.

Unexpected Bonus: Michael invites you to meet his family after the two of you get engaged, and you make some strange first impressions. First, you show up in your city suit because work ran late and you didn’t have time to change, and you debate monetary policy with Tommy at his own kitchen table. Polly remarks that it’s good practice for candidate debates, and you say that if this is all a candidate needs, you might as well run. (Michael stifles a smirk.) But then the whole family heads out for a hunting trip, and you shoot fowl and gut fish along with the best of them, silently reminding them that you grew up in the countryside along with Michael. The second-most rewarding moment of the trip comes when you sneak out at night to Michael’s tent, and Polly sees you, raises an eyebrow, but lets you go. That has to be some kind of approval, right? (The most rewarding moment of the trip comes when you arrive to his tent. Michael can make an entire meal of one kiss.)

* * *

## May Carleton

(after s4 AU)

[Originally posted by pcllygray](https://tmblr.co/Z8nHnc2TDII0a)

May Carleton was either the biggest mistake or the greatest triumph of your life. The plan was to use her in one of your long con games, but there was such a strange and captivating mix of bold and tentative in one small woman, such a wistful beauty, you fell head over heels for her, confessed the entire plot, and proposed to her on the spot. Today, you set your devious mind to expanding her horse training and breeding business, and you’re both happy as long as you can share long rides at twilight and one big four-poster bed afterwards.

Unexpected Bonus: After her “reputation” was destroyed by her previous affair with some rancid gangster-man, May permanently lost every last fuck she had to give (and she didn’t have that many in the first place). The horse breeding, training, and racing business is full of misogynistic assholes, but it is a thing of beauty and a joy forever to see the way she deals with them. You have seen with your own two eyes the expression on the peer, politician, and Duke of Wellington, Arthur Wellesley, when May just turned around and walked away from him as he was saying something condescending to her. You will treasure that look until your dying day.

* * *

## Ada Shelby

(after s4 AU: Ada never returns to America, but rather takes over much of the business when Tommy has the Golf Breakdown)

[Originally posted by cillionmurphy](https://tmblr.co/ZhTyLb2WrrXLz)

Ada sets out to run Shelby Company Limited like a proper, modern company, with a board and all, and she brings you in as a major part of the process, because of your long history with other highly profitable but somewhat shady companies. You two become absolutely inseparable, practically finishing each other sentences. On the surface, she enjoys your mordant sense of humor and you enjoy her cutting wit. Underneath, she’s the only one you confide your insecurities in, and vice versa. You’re the only ones who really understand what drives you to achieve greater and greater heights in business.

Unexpected Bonus: Although Ada is not herself a Communist anymore, she still raises Karl on some Communist and leftist literature and ideology, in keeping with her late husband’s wishes. He’s a scrappy kid, and you very much enjoy having late-night arguments with him. When he wins a debate prize at school, you take the whole family out to Italy for a well-deserved vacation and then spend half of that vacation arguing over how to deal with the rise of fascism, much to the horror of your more genteel fellow-travelers. (For the record: you think the situation could be addressed with assassinations, Karl thinks the downtrodden should rise up and demand equal rights for everyone, Ada thinks you’re both going to get sunburned, will you please come over and get some goddamn lotion?) Anyways, the ocean’s nice.

Additional Note: For those interested in knowing how good Ada’s strap-on game is: excellent. It’s fucking excellent.


	19. #258: Polly Gray, Isaiah Jesus, John Shelby

## Give And Take

You have a wonderful and mutually supportive relationship with your partner. Together, you and your partner are building something that you think will last and grow in a healthy way, setting boundaries and helping each other through rough times in life. You’re not afraid of asking for what you need or getting your partner’s help with some part of your own business, whether it’s to do with crime, politics, or family. Trust and communication are ultimately the cornerstones of your relationship, and that’s why you two have been able to last for so long, despite all the drama in Birmingham.

* * *

## Fuck Em All

Honestly, you’re out here fighting for yourself. You see so many people claiming to care about each other for religious, political, moral, ethnic, or other reasons, but ultimately, when a crisis occurs and true priorities are exposed, most people don’t really give a damn. At least you’re honest. You’re in it for yourself, maybe a few of your very closest friends, and your partner. You embrace your own ambitions and never let anything stop you from reaching your goals. You are someone that is absolutely to be feared, and everyone knows it! Wherever you go, the No Bullshit Zone follows.

Examples: Tatiana Petrovna, Alfie Solomons

* * *

## Hearth & Heart

Your greatest strengths are your emotional intelligence and your ability to deal with other people. You may be underestimated, but ultimately your gifts are priceless, whether used for private reasons or for professional ones: you can read people, persuade people, and connect with people. Your wide network and deep roots in the city means that you will often be the go-between in important deals, and you have a lot of contacts if you need them. Plus, when you have the time and resources, you know how to live the good life, with a pleasant household, delicious food, and real relationships.

* * *

## Polly Gray

(post-s4 AU: Polly, still pissed off at Tommy for sending Michael away, goes to London to run the Shelby businesses there.)

[Originally posted by fockingshelby](https://tmblr.co/Zp4Csa2YGR9ex)

You meet Polly at the Eden club, technically sober but drunk on your third big film success. As an actor, you’ve been lauded by critics and crowds alike, and you manage to charm even the notoriously steely Polly Gray into buying you a drink. You endeavor to see her whenever you can from then on out, and eventually, she starts to return the favor. You love it when you go to premieres with her on your arm, the both of you daring anybody to comment. Your greatest achievement is making her cry with your fifth movie, a sweeping historical romance.

Unexpected Bonus: You two are an absolute power couple of emotional intelligence. Together, you can charm, bewilder, browbeat, flirt, or argue your way into any adventure and out of any adventure. Not to mention you’re both fucking amazing liars with wardrobes that match your professional success. And sometimes you get bored. So anyways…that’s how you end up crashing a royal wedding. Gangster matriarch and upstart actor photographed with the King of England? You betcha.

* * *

## John Shelby

(s3 AU: he never married Esme)

[Originally posted by tommyshhelby](https://tmblr.co/Ztk8sa2VZDDSp)

You were John’s nurse way back during the war, and when he finds out you’ve fallen deadly sick, he just shows up at your door one day and refuses to be shooed away. You don’t understand his devotion, at first, but about a month later, after you’ve recovered, he says you were the only good thing about that whole fucking war and he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about you since. You love his smile, and he loves your convoluted, wild war stories, even if half of them are lies. When you two go out, you rule the Garrison.

Unexpected Bonus: John is so widely beloved by his family and friends that every single one of them tries to give you the shovel talk, some variation on “he’s a good man, he swaggers around like a young prince but he has real feelings, if you hurt him I’ll bury you.” It’s maybe scary coming from Arthur, but by the time fucking Finn swings around, you’ve heard it all before, and it’s all you can do not to laugh hysterically until after he’s left. Of course, give it a few months and your charm has all of them eating out of your hand. They love you. Even Tommy starts dropping hints that maybe you two should get married.

* * *

## Isaiah Jesus

(after s3)

[Originally posted by bonniebirdsgifcentre](https://tmblr.co/ZxJCmg2LCrz_Q)

As proprietor of one of the only pubs in Birmingham that’s open to everyone, regardless of background, you end up seeing Isaiah when the sheer whiteness of the Peaky enterprise gets to be too much for him…which, with the Shelbys, is pretty damn often. After late night conversations, he starts courting you in earnest, leaving you carefully selected bouquets with specific meanings in Victorian flower language. You mix him particularly strong drinks on the rare occasion he loses at boxing. The two of you get on so well that when Michael meets you, he thinks you’ve gotten secretly married.

Unexpected Bonus: When he’s wearing a Peaky cap, razor blade and all, Isaiah can go pretty much anywhere without getting hurt, so even though you close the pub ridiculously late at night, you two can always go for a moonlight wander in some unexpectedly picturesque corner of the city. His favorite spot is the art museum, illegally accessed after hours. Your favorite spot is one tall, pretty flat roof, which provides you with a full view of boats coming up and down the Cut.


End file.
